Wow! Has it really been 7 years? They say if you can make it thru the first 7 years, you can make it thru anything. My first question is "who says that"? Do the people who study these statistics make it thru the first 7 years? I know they just go by how many people actually stay married a lifetime. I know that most divorces happen in the first 7 years. I have heard of many that end after 20 years, though. Maybe those are the ones that didn't go through anything major the first 7 years, so they didn't have practice time for after the kids left. Maybe the ones that end in divorce early on are the ones that never really had a fighting chance to begin with? Why do marriages end in divorce anyway? Do those couples never really love each other when they say "I do"? Maybe they never have support of family or friends, no one rooting for them to make it. So many different things it could be...
There are times when I wonder where the years have gone. Other times, I wonder why it seems so long! So, here we are...7 years of marriage and 3 kids later... I am amazed when I look back & see what God began in our lives & see where we are now. In some ways, I don't think we've matured the way we should, and in other areas I know we have grown tremendously. There are experiences I never thought we would have to endure & there are things I am extremely grateful for. The ones I love to look back on are the births of all 3 of my babies. I have been blessed to have healthy pregnancies & easy deliveries compared to many women. I look back on these events & remember the happiness (along with exhaustion) that I felt! I remember feeling grateful for each healthy checkup, all the milestones reached & the pride of having extremely intelligent children! I also remember the fun times Chris & I have had with friends in the past 7 years. Going to Cedar Point (our favorite place) with Elva & Sharon Yoder for a weekend, and another year with a group of 3 other couples. Getting to know the Yoders has been one of God's major blessings in our life the past few years as they have 3 boys the same ages & have walked thru similar life experiences. In our first year of marriage, Chris went to a school for his CDL liscense (trucking). After being away from home & away from me for 3 months, I got to quit my job & go with him cross-country in the truck for 6 weeks. That was a fun time of travel for both of us as newlyweds.
Along with the good times, there were many hard/bad times. Before we were married, we walked thru the death of Chris' father and then the death of one of my close friends & her infant daughter. Of course, there's always the financial hard times, too. There were changes in our relationship with each daughter's birth that seemed to always get worse before better. I guess when you are young & in love, it's hard to imagine children will change your relationship. I always thought we would still be in love, even more so, but things do change & when I look back, I realize our love wasn't as strong as I thought. And now the past 6 months have been the hardest ever in our marriage. We have gone thru things I thought we knew how to avoid. We have gone thru things that have torn the strongest marriages apart, that have destroyed the strongest Christians faith in God. We have questioned God's love, our love, and the people we thought loved us. We are still going thru these feelings as we continue healing & working on our relationship. We continue to push thru the mud in hope that we will be stronger in our faith & in our love for each other.
So, I guess in all that I've said, my main point is WE MADE IT...thru the first 7 years, thru the good times, thru the bad times, thru the changes in ourselves, thru the battles Satan throws in our path, thru the blessings, thru the challenges of raising children (girls nonetheless), thru the testing of our faith, thru the paths that lead the wrong way, thru finding our way back to the right way, thru feeling in love one minute & out of love the next, thru times of contentedness, thru times of wanting something more... Granted, it hasn't been a lifetime, yet, but we beat the statistics so far! I am proud of us for sticking with it when we didn't want to & knowing that God has a higher calling for our marriage than what the world expects of us.
And now, one last thing I want to say. Happy anniversary, honey! I love you now, in this moment. You are the most precious 'thing' God has given me. In everything we have gone thru, you are more important to me than anything we have gone thru. You are & always will be the one I want & need to hold me at the end of the day. You are a wonderful father & husband in so many ways & I am learning to appreciate all that you do right in spite of the things I point out too often! I love you & saying "I do" is still the best decision I ever made!
God's blessings to all who read this!
1 comment:
That is beautiful Heather.
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